Being a psychic is much like being a time traveler in a sense. You see beginnings and endings that you have no control over. Most of the things you see and experience, you have no way of intervening or fixing. To feel utter helplessness in things you cannot change can drive you mad if you don’t find a positive focus to concentrate your energies on.

Not a lot of people understand what it feels like and believe me, that is ok. I wouldn’t want to put this hardship on anyone if I had the choice. I also wouldn’t give my abilities back if I had a choice either, so what does that say about me?

Being a psychic is draining. Mentally, physically, and emotionally. There is nothing you can do to prepare for the life you will live on a day to day basis. It is hard, it is lonely, and it is taxing on your health.

Sometimes I go through periods of optimistic hope and absolute awe of what the world holds. Then other times I feel nothing but the need to retreat and sleep for days. It weighs on you, but I take pride in the fact that I have never let it take over my obligations.

If you have not yet seen the movie “The Time Traveler’s Wife”, you may want to at some point. The struggles that “Henry” goes through are incredibly similar to what it is like being a psychic. The difference being that psychics don’t actually travel to different times, we simply glimpse it randomly. The confusion and odd facts that are gathered during the glimpse’ are quite similar. The story line itself doesn’t match mine in any way, but the way Henry comes and goes without control is generally the closest I can describe to my experiences.

Everything I see is out of context. For example, just imagine; you see the face of your own baby, years before you are even capable of thinking about being a parent. Arguments are pointless when you know that the relationship gets past it anyway. Holding on to a friendship longer than you should because you see that it is slowly drifting away, and there is nothing you can do to stop it. Seeing a loving marriage with someone, but knowing you can’t take away their free will, so you just have to be patient. Hearing car accidents in your sleep, and wondering when and where it will play out. Having to let your pride go when you held on to a decision too long, because you didn’t want to admit that you knew it wasn’t going to work out. Talk about a mind-fuck.

When I tell you about the conscious effort I make daily to think positively, it is not as simple as it sounds. To let the past go, to forgive myself, and to choose happiness takes a strong will and endless amounts of moral fortitude. I’m not trying to get praise or to tell you all how strong I am, I am trying to give you all a perspective of the darkness that comes with everyone’s different situations. This one being mine.

We all have dark times; just know that the good times are worth fighting for.

Projects that help you focus:

• Manual labor – because you see the results when done
• Meditation – a little inner peace never hurt anyone
• Reading – find what you love to learn about and just learn the shit
• Art – paint, make jewelry, pottery, metal working, wood working, glass blowing
• Exercise – get off your ass and go for a walk
• Nap – being well rested is good for you
• Take care of something – whatever you choose, just make sure you put that thing first, always, and be consistent
• Say something real once a day – tell someone the truth now and again, put yourself out there, you might be surprised by the positive response you get
• Do something scary – do something that frightens you every few months or so, don’t let yourself hold you back

Go with light and love.