At each home I have lived there is a certain type of entity that sticks around that specific location.  Sometimes there will be some overlap from place to place, but majority of the time I recall a certain type associated with that location. The variations of entities mostly change due to the surrounding factors; whether geographical, social, cultural, or emotional connection.

Once I lived in an apartment building that was generally quiet when it came to spirits. In the 3 years I lived in that location I only had one type of spirit frequent my space. They resembled children, there were several of them, all around the same age group (10 or so), with varying gender and cultural diversities.

There have been some controversy about the origin, purpose, and intentions of spirits that resemble children. Some people believe that they are evil, but I take every spirit on a case by case basis. The child spirits that I have seen were never malicious or evil, if anything they were mischievous and sought maternal attention and comfort. Which could get pretty annoying to the not so patient personality types. As long as they received some attention and a constant source of energy, they generally kept to themselves.

They started to play a game, of sorts, where they would jump on my bed throughout the night and wake me up. They would also chase my cat from one end of the apartment to the other. It was all in lighthearted good-natured fun.

After moving from that apartment to a condo down the street, they followed. More jumping on my bed in the middle of the night, and more streaks in the corner of my eye of a small child running quickly past. About half way through the year of my lease the activity slowed almost to a complete stop. At this point my partner had begun to stay at the house on weekends, which meant I didn’t spend as much time sitting around or sleeping alone. But every so often I would see the face of a child peer around a corner at me and quickly vanish. No jumping on the bed anymore though, which I actually admitted to myself that I missed mildly.

Fast forward to now; I have been living in my partners home for over a year now. The environment is relaxed and the spirit activity is numerous. But still no jumping on the bed, no flashes of a child running past me, and no innocent child like eyes peering around corners.

Until the other night.

I was having a sleepless night, and like most people, I was poking around social media on my cell phone. My eyes began to get extremely heavy and I knew it was time to wrap it up. I turn my phone off, set it on the side table, and quickly felt sleep engulfing me like a fog. It felt like a moment had passed, but when I finally come-to, I see that it has been 90 minutes. I am woken by a child shaking my arm as they stand next to my bed. “Momma! Momma!” says the little girls’ soft voice. In my half asleep state it doesn’t bother me that when I check the clock, there is no physical body standing there, only a sensed presence. I mumble, “Yes, Baby.” as I check and see my partner fast asleep next to me, with his rhythmic soft snore. She holds my arm softly with her little hands and says, “Momma, I have been waiting for you, but I get to see you soon!” I am very happy and still blissfully half-awake, I try to ask her when I will be able to see her; a month? a year? 6 months? But she just keeps saying, “Soon, Momma.” She then begins to fade away, like someone was just out of frame, calling her to come back in. I force myself into consciousness and will myself to concentrate. Maybe if I concentrate hard enough I can will the connection back to her.

There I sat, wide awake, no baby girl to connect with. And I knew I wouldn’t be able to reach her again until she was ready. The next day I took a pregnancy test. It was negative. It has been a week since then and I still haven’t seen or heard from her.

In my heart I hold my hope close, knowing that one day I will see her sweet face and be able to hold her in my arms. Until then, I will check around every corner for those beautiful innocent eyes to quickly slip back as she plays her silly game of hide and seek from Momma.

Go with light and love.

This is a bit of a serious topic and may not be fun for you all to read about, but bear with me. This is one of those things that some of you may also be battling with, therefore I want to breach the subject in order to open up a dialog. Now, let’s get down to business…

I suffer from Night Terrors and I believe that majority of psychics suffer from them as well. They are nightmares that bleed into your awakened reality. It is when my brain takes its fears and insecurities, mixes them with stress and sleep walking, which turns them into a distorted mess of crazy. I wake up more exhausted than I was before I laid down to sleep. They plague me for days, haunting my everyday life. They take the sparkle from my eyes and replace it with numbness. Majority of my bad days are a direct result of these occurrences.

That is my description/opinion of them, but here is what Wikipedia says they are, more specifically what separates them from every day nightmares; “The universal feature of night terrors is inconsolability, very similar to that of a panic attack. During night terror bouts, people are usually described as ‘bolting upright’ with their eyes wide open and a look of fear and panic on their faces. They will often scream. Furthermore, they will usually sweat, exhibit rapid breathing, and have a rapid heart rate. In some cases, individuals are likely to have even more elaborate motor activity, such as a thrashing of limbs—which may include punching, swinging, or fleeing motions. There is a sense that the individuals are trying to protect themselves and/or escape from a possible threat of bodily injury. Although people may seem to be awake during a night terror, they will appear confused, be inconsolable and/or unresponsive to attempts to communicate with them, and may not recognize others familiar to them. Occasionally, when a person with a night terror is awakened, they will lash out at the one awakening them, which can be dangerous to that individual. Most people who experience this do not remember the incident the next day. Sleepwalking is also common during night terror bouts, as sleepwalking and night terrors are different manifestations of the same parasomnia.”

They have always been a factor with me, especially when it comes to ghosts and energies. The spirits see it as a loophole, as an easy way into my subconscious. They will add to the mayhem and confusion, leaving you wondering what is ‘you’ and what is ‘them’. The lines between your own memories and what the spirits went through can blur, which makes you feel displaced.

For me, since I am a lucid dreamer, the major difference about night terrors and regular dreams is that I cannot control them. No matter how intense the night terrors get, I am along for the ride. Another factor that sets my situation apart is that I do remember my night terror experiences, I am not sure why I do, but one day I am hoping to figure that out. Thankfully the remembrance keeps me connected to who I am, because it can get a bit dicey when it is like doing a Vulcan Mind Meld on about 8 people at once. If you get that reference, then you know what’s up.

The fact that I am a Clairsentient Empath tends to make the night terrors multifaceted. I wake up with memories and knowledge of things that I did not have the previous day, which may sound pretty awesome at first – that is until those memories incorporate very graphic imagery that can be quite a shock to witness. While this ability can give information, it can also take away. I may have a vast array of knowledge one day, but it could potentially disappear overnight as well; leaving my mind ready for new information to be “downloaded” by the next spirit. I may retain a few morsels of information here and there, but I believe my brain has a fail-safe that keeps me from becoming too overburdened, by routinely clearing its “cache” on occasion. Which just means it will wipe out all information that is not used as a primary functional need. In layman’s terms, I may remember how to tie my shoes or how to operate a vehicle, but I will forget birthdays and what my favorite dessert is. Pretty neat, huh? NOPE.

I have never gone to anyone to talk about this subject, nor do I think I need to go to anyone. It is manageable and does not affect my day-to-day life. I keep extensive notes and calendars in order to counteract any memory deficiencies. I have found that taking regular vitamins help reduce some of the sleeplessness and anxiety that comes from the experiences. I generally take care of my physical and mental health as well as I can, because everyone should, but if I were completely honest with you all – I wouldn’t want this to go away. What if ‘curing’ this meant ‘curing’ my mind of any other abilities I have? That is not OK with me. This is a part of me that I have adapted to, I like myself and wouldn’t change me for anything in the world.

Like I said, this is me opening a conversation with you all. I am not a doctor, I have no training or credentials in any of this information, and I do not claim to have all the answers. All I have to give is my support, which I will give freely if needed. If any of you have been through something similar and have more information, please pass it on to me.

For support, information, or just random questions about any subject, my email address is yugenexistence@gmail.com .

Go with light and love.