You know what…I got this.

tumblr_lv8nlcvpxa1qjoitxo1_500Next month will mark 3 years since my Grandfather passed away. For most people, when a person close to them passes, that means you do not see them anymore. For a psychic, not so much.

My grandfather was the closest thing I had to a father figure – in the sense that he supported me emotionally, listened to me, never made me feel unusual, genuinely loved spending time with me, and a million other feelings that I couldn’t begin to explain to you all in an adequate amount of time. He taught me to love myself and he was the first male feminist influence I ever had, whether he knew it or not. We may not have agreed on everything, but we sure as heck respected each other for our opinions. He could also take a good amount of playful criticism, which I appreciate to this day.

The transition from living person to spirit form is a complex one, but is so much more than just a loss of a physical vessel. The spirits personality stays in tact, but the prejudices, societal construct and pressures that are taught to you throughout your life, can actually ‘melt’ away. A soul is left bearing only the base parts of their being, leaving it inherently positive or negative, depending on who you are on that level. In conclusion, if you are a good person deep down, that is what you are left with once the physical is stripped away. Which can mean the reverse is also true, but that is a conversation for another day.

All that being said, my grandfather is not gone and he follows me around quite a bit.

He has become the part of my conscious that influences the fight in me. He is the one that tells me, “I know darling, but that is enough crying, time to get up and fix it.” It is actually quite funny to express this to you all because of the outward appearance of the man. He was, for lack of a better term, a handsome nerd. He was smart as hell, sure, but he wore horned rimmed glasses, new all about computers before computers were even ‘a thing’, acted in the local theater, and could play the piano better than anyone I have ever known. Now, he made this look good and never gave a crap about what others thought of him, it was just him. This just made the puzzle that was him all the more fantastical.

From my previous article, “The story of Keith“, you all are aware that my spirit guide is a huge and ‘scary’ tattooed man that exudes peace. Keith’s advice consists of passivity, like a gentle giant that wouldn’t think of hurting a fly. Then you have my 5’9” grandfather, with his thick military-issued horned-rimmed glasses telling me that I am strong and capable of taking on anything I put my mind to. Essentially issuing a battle cry! It goes without saying that it is the most humorous thing you can imagine. But that gives you a glimpse of why I have always enjoyed living my life outside of the ‘typically assumed’ spectrum. Just saying, never judge a book by it’s cover.

Anyway, he stays close to me these days. There are so many things in my life that I once held back from him, but now he sees it all, and I wonder why I could never confide these things to him. It doesn’t really matter much anymore though, he is in the middle of everything now. He hugs me when I am half asleep, he sits in the car with me when I have to do my long commutes. He tells me when I am wrong, and then when I am right. He tells me to stay my ground when all my instincts tell me to run. He is there for me when having everything I ever wanted leaves me terrified, he tells me that I deserve the best and am worthy of great things.

You would think that having your family member hanging around you all the time would get awkward, trust me when I say it doesn’t. Respectful spirits leave you alone during times that you wish it, and my grandfather is one of those spirits. Truly good people/spirits will not even hesitate to accommodate you during your most vulnerable moments. Aside from that, spirits are like children in the way that they are innocent. Urges that the physical body promotes within you do not apply when in spirit form. There are no bodily chemicals or hormones driving you to do or need. It is a freedom that brings about a peaceful wisdom without fear or anger. It is truly a remarkable feeling.

I feel the need to have a disclaimer, of sorts, in here. If, at any time, you feel that a spirit is not abiding by your wishes, cut off all communication with them. They can not approach you if you do no wish it. The only power spirits have over you is the power you allow them to have. If any entity or spirit does not listen to you when you say no, or even gives you a feeling of unease, banish it from your space. When I say the word “banish”, I don’t mean go pay some local eclectic shop owner to do a complex spell for you. I mean tell the spirit or entity that they are not allowed around you anymore. Say it out loud and feel it deep into your core, then feel free to forget about them completely. In fact, the less you dwell on it, the less power that energy has over you. No exceptions either, define your comfort level, then do not allow those lines to be tested or crossed. You would be amazed how this actually helps you in your day-to-day relationships with others in physical form as well.

To anyone that ever had (or still has) a person that makes you feel the way my grandfather does, cherish it. If they have passed, know they are never truly gone as long as you need them. They stay with you and guide you through hard times. They celebrate the good times alongside you. Trust me, I see the dead y’all.

-A. Elise

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